To the womanising bouncer who finally had his heart
My friend Jack has an insatiable addiction. He has to
have sex all the time. One week without sex drives him
insane. Jack is not considered handsome and most women
don't give him a second glance. He is a pharmacist and
he has created a process by which he can seduce women.
He approaches them on the street and asks them out for
dinner and promises them an unforgettable night. he
asks each woman what is their favourite taste in the
world and then he goes home to his laboratory and
develops that taste in a serum and injects it into his
vein. At dinner he kisses the woman and leaves them
with their favourite taste on their mouths. Jack
developed many assorted serums: wild mountain
strawberries, essence of truffles, oysters kilpatrick,
avocado and lemon, garlic and cheese. there was no
taste that Jack could not create. One day he
approached the most beautiful girl at the End of the
World and asked her what her favourite taste was. She
had heard of his seduction technique and replied thats
he loved the taste of moonbeams. Jack was besotted
with her and spent many hours creating her request.
Over dinner he kissed her and a few seconds later she
spat into his face. "This isn't moonbeams," she
snarled, "you reek of poisoned rainbows. " Jack was
devastated and each time I visit him now at the mental
asylum he sits alone in his chair at the window,
gazing hopelessly at the moon.
From the lonely man
handing out pamphlets
to the end of the world.