There’s no disabled girls with style like mine

A woman wearing makeup must be fine. 

They tell me there is nothing wrong with you.  

Disabled girls cannot have style like mine.  

Good-looking girls are not supposed to whine

or be unhappy with what they can’t do. 

A woman wearing makeup must be fine

and healthy, strong, except when her waistline

is big: then the first thing she needs to do

is lose that weight. No girls with style like mine

have hidden disabilities, or climb

up mountains of distress. From birth, we knew

that little girls in dresses must be fine

and happy. When I talk about decline,

my sobbing, shattered meltdowns, self-harm, blue

nights, they fail to see, through style like mine,

my terrors, my self-medicating wine.

I dress well and it helps my grip stay true

on mental health. My fault for looking fine.

You’re clearly well, don’t waste the doctor’s time.

Autistics do not look the way you do.  

A woman wearing makeup must be fine. 

There’s no disabled girls with style like mine.